pt 3

edit: I guess I actually forgot to post about Day 2 home with Daddy. So Monday, Day#1 (off work) - was the day following Daddy's night (called night #2). Day #2 (Tuesday) actually seemed like she was getting better. She ate a couple of bites of banana and yogurt, and 2 sips of milk for breakfast. Then she sat next to me, while I did some work form home, and drew on some paper. Then she drew on her hand and wanted to wash it off. On the way to the bathroom, she was so excited, she started to run. And tripped and fell head-first into the door frame. Screaming, crying, you name it.
I thought she needed a long drive to get some extra nap time in, so we drove to another part of the bay for some lunch. Which she did (sleep). Got there, ordered up a fish taco with some beans and rice. She had 1 bite of beans and rice, started coughing and wanted NO more. She sat on my lap and was hot and flushed in the face, so we got back into the car and drove home. She slept again for about 30 minutes.
When we got home, I turned on the choo-choo for her, and she sat, leaning up against the couch on some pillows, zoning out with the video, until she finally pooped out around 3:15 and fell alseep. So I left her there on the floor to sleep for about 1 and 1/2 hours while I did some work from home.
She had a couple of bites of dinner, and then she was done. DW had a great idea for some menthol chest rub, so off I went while Mommie and LG did bath time. She didn't want milk, but sat them calmly while I rubber the menthol on her. She actually seemed to like it. I wondered if they used something similar in the orphanage (I'm actually pretty sure they did, seems like a very 'Chinese' thing to do). DW was able to get her down for sleep at 9.
edit complete.

Well actually, it's Day 3. Another day home with LG yesterday. She actually slept the whole night without getting up or crying out once! However, she still had a pretty deep cough, and I was thinking that at the daycare, she'd be playing outside etc, so she wouldn't be resting. So she stayed with me, we went grocery shopping, then went to have lunch with Mommie. She fell asleep in the car for about 10 minutes. We actually ran some errands and she didn't want anything to eat, so we went home and she slept for about 40 minutes in the car (i just parked it until she coughed herself awake).
Then we went inside and I was able to whip up some tunasalad and feed her some on some butter crackers. Whew! It's nice to know she's starting to eat again. She didn't want any milk, though, makes her cough alot.
Then I made her lie down, turned off the choo-choo video, turned off the Christmas tree lights, pryed the choo-choo out of her fingers, turned on her lullaby music, and let her cry it out for about 10 minutes, "Mommmieeee! My choo-choo! My choo-choo! Lights (Christmas tree)!!! Mommiee!! Mommmieeee!!! etc. (10 minutes)"
Then she was out light a light. For 2 hours.
Had a fantastic dinner where she actually ate a good amount.
Bath, night-time milk, some menthol rub, and asleep within 5 minutes of laying down.

Then Mommie and I had a little talk (again).
Her: Do you want me stay home with her tomorrow?
Me: Well, I absolutely need to go to work, because I keep rescheduling this one thing that I have to get done.
Her: But I have an 8:30 appointment.
Me: Depends if she's feeling OK; I guess I could drop her off at my parents
Her: ....
Me: I really think you should spend some time with her.
Her: It's really no different than her going to daycare (meaning the same number of hours that DW and LG weren't spending together)
Me: Well, it really is different, becasue she spent the last 3 days almost exclusively with ME.
Her: ....
Her: Well, I guess you could drop her off and tell them to call ME if she needs to be picked up (due to her cough)
Me: Maybe you should try to get off early, so you can pick her up and spend some girl time together.
Her: She just has a different relationship with you than she does with me...I don't know why, but it's different.
Me: I know, but she'll be really happy to spend some alone time with you...

and with that, the teeth-brushing, etc. was completed and the conversation was over.



Oh and LG slept soundly through the night, just coughing a couple of times, and with a little decongestant, she was able to breathe wasy and cough-free for the next 3 hours. Going to daycare, Daddy's going to work, Mommie's going to work, then Daddy's gonna call Mommie at work and harass her to get off work early.

1 year

Well it’s time to reflect on our 1year anniversary (which we celebrated last week). DW and I took the day off of work, and we had a leisure breakfast as a family, went to the photography studio to take a family portrait 1 year after our first (which was at the Civil Affaris office in Guangzhou, China). During the preview of the pictures, LG had a little stomach-ache, and proceeded to have diarrhea right there in the photo studio. So I hastily chose some pictures while DW cleaned up LG in the bathroom. We went home, had some lunch, LG took a nap for 3 hours (I guess she wasn’t feeling well), woke up with more diarrhea, and that killed our entire afternoon. No visit to the zoo, no swimming in the pool. Just us 3 hanging as a family, through sickness and health, just like 1 year ago at the White Swan, where the first night, LG slept between us on the rock hard mattress, and proceeded to have a blasted-poopy diaper in the middle of the night, with her butt planted VERY close to my head. I wouldn't have it any other way.

It’s been a wonderful year, and a quick one, too. My, does time fly. She’s almost 2 now, talking a little bit, in a toddler bed now, can take off her clothes and shoes by herself, starting potty training, eats with spoon and fork, and wears 24 months clothes (where a year ago, she was wearing 6 month clothes!). Happy 1 year, Baby. Daddy loves you.

Now I need to get back to backing up your video tapes from 1 year ago!

Chinese Family Traditions for a Progressive

The Chinese have a family tradition of the Red Egg and Ginger Party for new babies. There is a lot written about the REG and the significance/requirements. I may be somewhat inaccurate in what I state here about the parties, but I think the details are only necessary as adjunct to my point. Feel free to add comment to any differences you may have been told.

Traditionally (in the old days of China), some babies did not live past 1 month after being born. If a baby lived past 1 month, a party was held to celebrate the life of that baby. The new mother and baby were kept in seclusion, to ward off illness (and presumably evil spirits from taking the baby) and for the new mother to heal. The new mother ate eggs and ginger to help recuperate (Ginger has many medicinal qualities). Eggs also symbolize fertility. And Red, well, red is good luck in Chinese tradition. So there you have it in a summary; traditionally, 1 month after the baby is born, a party with red eggs and ginger takes place.

In the U.S., the Red Egg and Ginger party usually occurs about 3 months after the baby is born. And this is primarily due to the inability to reserve a venue, plan a party, and send out invitations within 1 month. So there you have it, Chinese American tradition is 3 months after the baby is born, REG party.

For Chinese adoptive parents (or should I say, adoptive parents of Chinese kids?)*, I have seen some suggestions (maybe FCC or from an adoption ageny website?) for including and incorporating Chinese culture in the family, 100 day celebration or REG. (I think the U.S. 3 month REG is sort of a combination of 100-day and traditional REG?)

Well, for us, we certainly weren’t going to have a REG 1 month after coming home (it would be too many people too soon for LG, we’re still forming OUR bonding and attachment). And we weren’t going to do a 3-month or 100-days after coming home, since the road to successful bonding and attachment was still TBD. And the fact that 3 months or 100-days would have put us into the Christmas/ New Years time, which is virtually impossible to try to reserve a place or restaurant or catering for.

And LG is older than 1-month, 3-months, and 100-days. So what to do? 7 months after coming home, we’re celebrating. The great debate is whether or not to have Red Eggs and Ginger. Some say, since LG isn’t a baby anymore, there’s no need for REG, just have a party, with no REG. Others are saying REG isn’t ‘appropriate’ – I am assuming because LG wasn’t birthed by DW. I think the word ‘appropriate’ is just a poor choice of words. I think REG IS appropriate, because while the egg symbolizes fertility, is also symbolizes ‘new life’ and LG is just that for our family. New Life.

* added edit: adoptive parents of Chinese kids